Today's Angel - Hell

My old spiritual director, Father Jim, said to me once,

"Tom, as a priest I must say that there IS indeed a Hell. That aside, who am I to say whether anyone is there or not."

I don't deny Hell, per se. I do however, have difficulty in perceiving Hell as existing in tandem with an all-loving God. I realize that God's ways are far beyond my own, but that doesn't make this any easier for me to understand.

I relate it, perhaps poorly, to the relationship I have as father to my children. Could my children one day insult and reject me, denouncing their relationship with me? Sure they can. Would I ever stop hoping they would have a change of heart and return to a loving relationship with me. I can't imagine I would. I'd wait on the porch for one or both of my prodigals son to return, bounding off the porch as soon as I saw them on the horizon taking one step toward me. I understand punishment and the need to answer for our actions and inactions spiritually. I understand free will, BUT I have a hard time applying it here.

I get tripped up by the idea a flawed limited human being could possibly make a reasoned free will decision about being eternally damned. That an all-loving God, who loves us more than any parent ever loved a child, could possibly allow his Beloved to make a decision that - by its very nature - is limited, flawed and incomplete about an eternity of suffering. Would I allow my children to make such a decision? Never. There's "tough love" and then there is infinite sufferng versus finite crime, regardless of the heinous nature of the crime. "Tough love" eventually teaches a lesson. Hell does not allow learning...it is eternity without the possibility of parole.

In this context, I guess that the concept of Purgatory makes spiritual/metaphysical sense to me; do the crime, you do the time, so to speak.

I do know the biblical and catechetical teachings on the problem of Hell and the problem of suffering in general. I understand them. I do struggle mightily with them, all the same. May the veil be lifted from my eyes...one of these days.

Tuesday in the Octave of Easter
Daily Mass Readings
Acts 2:36-41
Psalm 33:4-5,18-20,22
John 20:11-18

In the upper room...

Talk about despair. My friend, my master, my Lord was executed and buried. All our hopes that were linked to you, Jesus, that you just might be the Messiah that would deliver us from underneath the boot of the Romans.

Everything we'd seen...ah, how could it possibly end like this??? You turned water into wine! You walked on water! You fed thousands of people with half a wicker basket of food! You restored sight to the blind man! You cast out demons more times than I can count! You gave US the power to cast them out! Lazarus was DEAD, and now he's alive, hiding here with us!

How is it that Lazarus is alive, but you are dead? How is that possible???

You mentioned in the garden before they took you away that if you wanted, you could summon 12 legions of angels to protect you! Why DIDN'T you? What were you waiting for??? All the good you did, all that you taught us...where was the fire you showed in the Temple when you drove out the moneychangers? You just let them take you, like a lamb to the slaughter.

Oh and it was a slaughter. John told us what they did to you. The beatings. The spitting. That unending flaying with the whips. That horrific crown they made you wear...what, was that supposed to be FUNNY? Being made to carry your cross (I know that sounds familiar to me, but I can't place my finger on it). And then, being nailed to that same cross, disgraced, naked, for hours in agony, all in front of your Mother. I would have stayed, SHOULD have, but I was frightened. They would have recognized our accent, they would have known our faces from that day in the Temple.

Then that terrible storm.

I know the Temple guards are looking for us, probably to do the same to us as they did to you. No one's been able to talk to Peter at all...I've never seen him like this. No one's seen Judas since the Garden, and that's a damned good thing too - how could he DO that to us, to you? And dammit Jesus, how could you LET him??? How could you let this happen??? You wouldn't even let us fight for you. We believed what you said! We believed you were what you said you were! We...ah, I can't go on. I don't have the strength.

It's better that we stay here for awhile, at least until things calm down. Mary wants to go to the tomb to tend to your body, since they had to leave in such a hurry yesterday because of the Sabbath. We were looking to Peter to stop her, but he waved her out anyway...she seemed to need to go. It's still dark, but no one's sleeping here anyway. I cannot believe that it's ended this way. I miss you, Jesus, so, so much. And I'm angry. And I'm frightened. And I feel alone.

If only I could see you, hear your voice, feel your hand on my shoulder again. If only...

Vigil of the Holy Night of Easter
Genesis 1:1-2:2
Genesis 22:1-18
Exodus 14:15-15:1
Isaiah 54:5-14
Isaiah 55:1-11
Baruch 3:9-15,32-4:4
Ezekial 36:16-28
Romans 6:3-11
Matthew 28:1-10

Good Friday

Behold...Behold the wood of the cross
On which is hung our Salvation.
Oh come let us adore.

Good Friday of the Lord's Passion
Isaiah 52:13-53:12
Psalm 31:2,6,12-13,15-16,17,25
Hebrews 4:14-16; 5:7-9
John 18:1-19:42

Who was Judas, really?

Reading this article in America Magazine

today got me thinking; has Judas Iscariot gotten a bad rap throughout Christian history?

The Gospels describe him as greedy, a thief, jealous, demon possessed. In Paradise Lost, Dante portrays him being chewed headfirst in Satan's mouth for all eternity. Does Judas deserve such a fate? And the article makes an excellent point; how could Judas remain an Apostle, amongst Jesus's closet friends in the world, and retain all of these horrid qualities?

I have no answers, but it is something I've thought about often, particularly when entering the Triduum. Was Judas a Zealot, trying to force Christ's hand in proclaiming His Kingship by having Him arrested? Did Christ somehow make Judas understand and accept the role he was to play in salvation, as in The Last Temptation of Christ? Was he some poor dupe of the wiley Sanhedrin, as he was in Zefferelli's Jesus of Nazareth? Did Satan literally have his minions enter into Judas as described in the Gospels and in the visions of Blessed Anne Catherine Emmerich?

When he saw the havoc his betrayal had caused, did Judas weep as Simon Peter wept after denying Him?

Judas Iscariot, Apostle of Christ, I wonder about your fate from time to time.

Holy Thursday, Mass of the Last Supper
Daily Mass Readings
Exodus 12:1-8,11-14
Psalm 116:12-13,15-18
1 Corinthians 11:23-26
John 13:1-15

Preparing to enter the Mystery

"C'mon back! Get your sins forgiven and be ready for Easter!"
- Father Ralph

St. Brigid's was packed today, with folks both going to Mass and waiting for Confession. I was there for the latter; it hasn't been the best Lent for me and I wanted to enter the Triduum with a glad heart to celebrate the Sacred Mysteries. When I saw how many folks were waiting for Confession before me, I almost walked out. I counted 10, and lunch hour was already half over. I stayed.

Even after the first "confessee" took 10 minutes or more, I stayed. When it appeared the second wasn't going to be zipping along either, I gathered myself to go. That's when Father Ralph and his assistant pastor came in from the rectory. They were both in street clothes...but both were wearing their purple stoles.

Father said, "I heard through the grapevine that we are blessed to have a large number of faithful looking for God's mercy. So we're doing triple duty today! C'mon back! Get your sins forgiven and be ready for Easter!"
They both set up shop at opposite ends of the church, quietly hearing confessions in the pews, while Father J continued in the confessional.

Father Ralph kept me in that church today...for a confession that was admittedly difficult. Diffcult, but oh, so necessary. Thank you to all the good priests of St. Brigid's for making sure all of us who needed the sacramentally grace of Christ was able to receive it.

Daily Mass Readings
Isaiah 49:1-6
Psalm 71:1-6,15-17
John 13:21-33,36-38

A letter to the Catholic League

This morning, the Catholic League, a civil rights organization that advocates for the rights of Catholics took out a full page ad in the New York Times, addressing the sex abuse scandals. Please follow the link to read this ad., which has been labeled "straight talk".

While it is admirable and right for the League to advocate for wrongly accused priests and bring false accusers to light, this ad in my opinion again misses the mark when it comes to addressing this scandal as we in the pews see it and experience it. I sent the following letter to the Catholic League this afternoon:

To Mr. William Donohue, President of the Catholic League

My name is Thomas Rooney. I am a Roman Catholic husband and father of two boys. I am also a 3rd Degree Knight of Columbus, a degreed member of the Ancient Order of Hibernians, and a candidate to the Secular Franciscan Order. I am active in my parish. I want all that to be clear, in that I have nothing to gain and no axe to grind against the Catholic Church. I feel I must address the ad which the League placed in the New York Times today.

The Catholic League and the hierarchy of our Church in general are frustrating to me (and I imagine, to many other faithful Catholics), in that they don’t seem to realize the depth of this issue or the breadth of our embarrassment and anger. They don’t seem to understand that there are two prongs to this abuse crisis. The first is where the hierarchy has concentrated, and has done so admirably; the actual sexual abuse of children and teens by clergy and religious. Most dioceses in the United States have implemented the specifics of the 2002 USCCB Dallas Charter well to address past abuse and prevent further abuse. Yes, the charter needs tweaking, in order to protect innocent clergy and religious against unwarranted accusations from those seeking financial gain at the expense of the Church. But the spirit of righting the wrongs seems to be there.

The second prong to the scandal has been, in my opinion, woefully ignored by the vast majority of the hierarchy. This is the seemingly callous nature of many in the hierarchy addressing the scandalizing of our children. To us in the pews, especially those of us with children, the age of the victims doesn’t matter. The degree of abuse (one-time fondling versus serial rape) doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter if the abuse was “consensual”, as if such a thing could exist. It doesn’t matter that “this happens in other churches”, as if that is supposed to make a difference to us. And most of us could care less if the abuser's orientation is homosexual or otherwise. The legal hairsplitting has to end. The indignant scrambling for excuses has to end. “Mistakes, horrible mistakes, were made” statements, always in the passive voice, always grudgingly given, have to end.

We in the pews hear constantly, from the Catholic League to the bishops themselves, about the horrible media that simply won’t let this go, the media which always wants to paint the Church in the worst light to sell subscriptions. In many cases, I must agree with this assessment. The Church makes for a big target, and the scandal makes for a “juicy” ongoing story. However, keep in mind that the “horrible media” in Boston is the only reason this scandal came to the light of day in the first place in the U.S. Would Cardinal Law, now with a plum Vatican assignment, have brought this forward, indeed, addressed this at all, had not the Globe forced his hand? It is not only the abuse, which is horrible enough…it is the shuffling of the abusers, the secrecy, the lies by many of the hierarchy that simply has not been addressed in any adequate manner that continues to scandalize our beloved Church.

There is a sacred trust between the congregation in the pews and those who are to teach us, to lead us in prayer and Sacrament. This trust has been shattered by the hierarchy’s actions and inactions during these proceedings. With the bishops’ collective role in allowing this horror to continue all in the name of, ironically enough, protecting the Church from scandal, we as Church were scandalized twice. Many have left the Church in disgust. Those of us who remain have had to endure explaining, time and again, how we could possibly remain Catholic, how we could remain members of this Church where our leaders stick their heads in the sand, hoping scandal will disappear if they can only remove it from their own diocese. Many of us who remain are embarrassed and humiliated for our beloved Church. The answer I give is simple; that the Catholic Church my home and I will not be run out of my own home. My older son lovingly and proudly serves at the altar, and we have wonderful priests at our parish. However, even with these fine role models, I would think twice about encouraging a priestly or religious vocation in my son, so he wouldn’t have to bear the brunt of that damaged trust, simply by virtue of wearing a collar or habit. It hurts to admit that, and this is only a small aspect of the pain as a whole. I suspect similar pain is widespread amongst the faithful who remain.

When we go to Confession, Catholics say an act of contrition before we receive Sacramental absolution for our sins. We then have to do our penance; make amends for the harm we caused by our sin, either through prayer, action or both. If there were any sense of true contrition from the hierarchy for the role they’ve played in perpetrating this scandal against the Church - the People of God, the very people whose spiritual care is entrusted to them - then perhaps we’d be further down the road to healing. We as Church hunger for healing. We want our shepherds to care for us, to help feed our souls, and to defend us from the wolves. But we will not be dismissed as unreasonable when we see our shepherds hiding in the brush as the wolves are circling. Especially when our own lambs are at risk.

Your Excellencies and Eminences; be the Men you were ordained to be. Stand up for us. Protect us. Lead us by example. Be truly contrite to those you have wronged, do your penance, and make your amends. Lead us down the road to healing our beloved Catholic Church.

Pray for us, as we pray for you.

Pax et Bonum,
Thomas Rooney

This ad coincidentally is released as the USCCB released its own report of the need to update the Dallas charter.

May God grant strength and compassion to the spiritual leaders of our beloved Church, William Donohue of the Catholic League, and the rest of the People of God who endure and pray for an end to this ongoing crisis.

Daily Mass Readings
Daniel 13:1-9,15-17,19-30,33-62
Psalm 23:1-6
John 8:1-11

From a Sibling.....

One of my Franciscan brothers, Deacon Joe, sends daily tidbits via email. It's usually forwarded several times over so as a rule, I usually don't read them (sorry, Joe!) Today's tidbit was different and it's definitely something I needed to read through today. I share it with you now:

POINTS ON HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR LIFE

Personality:
1. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
2. Don't have negative thoughts of things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
3. Don't overdo; keep your limits.
4. Don't take yourself so seriously; no one else does.
5. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.
6. Dream more while you are awake.
7. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
8. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner of his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
9. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
10. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
11. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
12. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
13. Smile and laugh more.
14. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Community:
15. Call your family often
16. Each day give something good to others
17. Forgive everyone for everything
18. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6
19. Try to make at least three people smile each day
20. What other people think of you is none of your business
21. Your job will not take care of you when you are sick. Your family and friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:
22. Put GOD first in anything and everything that you think, say and do.
23. GOD heals everything.
24. Do the right things.
25. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
26. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
27. The best is yet to come.
28. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
29. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.
30. If you know GOD you will always be happy. So, be happy.

Keep sending these nuggets, Joe! You never know who might dig them up.

Daily Mass Readings
Isaiah 49:8-15
Psalm 145:8-9,13-14,17-18
John 5:17-30